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You're not a Victoria Secret model, and that's okay


So you've been thinking about doing a glamorous boudoir session for yourself, but the models in the magazines make you feel like you aren't worthy...


Let me let you in on a not-so-little secret. The magazines are bullshit and Victoria's Secret is a beauty scam perpetuated by a man. They've only recently attempted to be size, age, and ability inclusive and it's been a very sad attempt.


Take it from someone who stepped out of their comfort zone and became a burlesque performer in her thirties as a chubby broad..... YOU ARE SEXY NO MATTER WHAT SIZE YOU ARE. I legit thought that not a single person would pay to see me perform and you know what.... that was the biggest lie I ever told myself.


Member of the itty-bitty-titty-committee? Inherited your dad's non-existent ass?


OR THE OPPOSITE....


Your boobs big enough to suffocate you in your sleep and make you feel heavy? Your ass could take out a city block if you turn the right way?


Your tummy is flat but it has scars or stretch marks? Or your tummy has never been flat and has always been your "problem area"?


I've heard it all. Every insecurity you can possibly imagine.. big or small. And it baffled me because all I saw was beauty. We're very guilty of seeing beauty in others, but not ourselves. I've even had ACTUAL MODELS talk down about themselves. (Negative self-talk not allowed in studio, btw.)


The media is a lie. Say it again. The media lies. This is why the Body Positive Movement emerged. Because if we can see people like us in the media, we might not feel so bad about ourselves. REPRESENTATION IS KEY.


Beauty is based on or influenced by personal feelings, tastes, or opinions. And most of our personal feelings about ourselves are developed over time by external sources. We have compared ourselves to UNATTAINABLE imagery that has been photoshopped to death in magazines and online. We have listened to the way our mothers and fathers talked about themselves as we grew up and in a lot of cases, it was negative. We've had partners that destroyed our confidence. We learned to hate ourselves because we don't fit "society's mold" of what is beautiful. But it's all not true. And don't get me started in the fuckery that is DIET CULTURE.


You're not a Victoria Secret model, and that's okay.


You are beautiful now. You are worthy now. You don't have to change a thing about yourself.



If you don't believe me... take it from some of the women who have worked with me:


Growing up in a Latin family you grow up around and with hearing certain words and phrases that do not necessarily make you feel good about yourself. They would say things like "you're getting fatter." Or "you've gotten very skinny" and so I used to struggle with my weight when I got into my teens, I also used to have a problem with my smile for many years, which is my favorite feature now. But it also started after someone very close to me told me to smile less bigger because showing my gums was not pretty. And that my lips were too small and I used to get my makeup done to make them look bigger. I cut toxic people out of my life, read books, opened up to people about it, tried new things, broke old habits and started to do shadow work on myself. Break the chains that hold me down and give the love I give to so many back to myself for once. - Livette
 
As a child/teenager I was always the bigger girl in my group of friends so I have always struggled with not being skinny and feeling like I didn’t fit in. As an adult I married and then dated very toxic people, they would call me fat and always talk about my weight or my appearance when we fought. They would call me a slut or whore if I wore anything that exposed any part of my body. They were abusive even in a physical manner which made me feel more worthless than ever. As a girl who was already struggling with self love it hurt to the core...fast forward I met Kristy over a Facebook post and she was trying out a new location and wanted girls to be her model. I decided fuck it why not, met her in a old building and she took some amazing pictures of me butt ass naked. This sparked an interest to have some more done but this time actually try for it. I book my first full session, she dolled me up, and that’s when it became an addiction. I realized in that moment behind that camera I didn’t have to hide from anyone. It didn’t matter if I was the “bigger girl”, what mattered is my happiness. I realized I am beautiful in my own skin. After having twins I can’t expect to have that perfect body, whatever that is anyways, I have to love my body as it is. I have grown to love myself with the help of not only Kristy but the other women in our group, some true dedication to myself, cutting out all toxic people in my life, divorce and many other breakups. Some days I still struggle with thinking of my body looked this way I would be more happy but then I snap back to reality go searching through my photos and remember that time I was brave enough to step behind a camera and how it changed my world. - Belinda
 
I have always felt like I was ugly and unattractive. I still do for the most part but the first step I did to try and help myself was my photo shoot with Kristy. I can’t even begin to explain how much that one shoot left my confidence. Like I said I still have my doubts but from my session with her I seen the beautiful sexy side of me.

- Roberta

PLEASE REMEMBER TO BE KIND TO YOURSELF.

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